This picture makes me cry!

This picture makes me cry!
Thought it was time to change my picture

Monday, August 13, 2007

I DID IT - Trixie Style!!!

Hi all! So I have been MIA this weekend - we only have dial-up available at home so I rarely get on the net. So what did I do??? Well - I hauled my rusty ass to the Y and did the Cardio Plus class...........all I can say is HOLY SHIT!!! That instructor chick was a slavedriver, insane, mercenary, crazy AND she was like 65..........I couldn't keep up with her and I'm 28!! She was doing crap that olympic gymnasts don't do.......okay well maybe not quite that bad but all that step shit is rough. Then there was the "grab your weights girls"..............WHAT - weights.......hang on a sec here, Barbie didn't sign up for weights!! So let me start at the beginning.

I got up at 7:30 Saturday morning so that I could make sure I was on time to class........showered, dressed, kissed Ken goodbye and told him it may be the last time he ever saw me alive! Hopped in the car and tried to get pumped up.......really I was trying not to hyperventilate......I was so nervous - you would have thought that I was going on a blind date or something! So I get to the Y and my bod bud is pulling out of the parking lot..........I picked up my cell phone and told her that she was BUSTED - Get your ass back here!! We lurk into the Y - mind you, I have NO idea what I'm getting in to. I grab a towel and follow K off to the torture chamber aka workout room. K who is a pro at this stuff tells me to grab a step.......steph, huh, what??? She points to the corner and I realize that I must assemble my step. The step is assembled and I am ready, got my water, my towel, my weights and I'm feeling pretty good about this whole thing......there are just a few people in there and none of them look particularly menacing so I'm ready to roll. Then the music starts.......we start with basic steps - up and down, up and down - then suddenly it all takes a turn for the worse........Sharon aka Exercise Nazi, turns up the music and begins making us really move..........what the hell is a B step - I haven't even learned the A step yet. In my head, Trixie is screaming, stop the ride, let me off but there is no turning back - not in front of a room full of people..........so I sweat and I step and then it happens.....drum roll please.........in usual Trixie fashion - I fucking trip over my step.........no not a graceful slip but a full fledged, fall over the step and in the process almost take out 2 other people - now if I had to fall and take out someone, I would hope that it would be my friend cause at least we could laugh together but no - not no but hell no - I almost take out a senior aged woman and the very petite lady beside her........they were shocked and horrified.........I of course just laid there rather enjoying the cool of the floor!! Then the weights start........I'm not kidding girls......it was 20 minutes into it and I tell K - gee, I'm glad this class is only a half hour........she started giggling like some sick and twisted psycho clown.........she says with glee "no, it's an hour"........WTF!!! I am convinced that I will have to have mouth to mouth when this sweatfest is over! Finally after 45 minutes the Exercise Nazi turns to us and says, "now for the cooldown"............thank you god......hallelujah........suddenly I feel like redemption has come............Sharon tells us to grab a mat and she puts on some soft music.........my legs feel like jello but the thought of laying down makes me push on........I get on mat and lay there enjoying the feeling of doing NOTHING. Obviously the gods were not smiling on me as suddenly Sharon begins telling us it was time to start Ab work..........now tell me how in the hell is that a cooldown???? So for the next 10 minutes this crazy bitch has us crunching and huffing and twisting and rolling. Not only did I look like I was having a seizure but I also had to perform half of these contortionist manuevers with K staring at my ass!! By the time that class was over I wasn't sure if I was alive or dead but damnit this Barbie is going back for more............the rush afterwards was fab and K was so pumped - the torture was momentary but just the time to work on me was rewarding!

Today is the start of c25k and I'm going to have to hit the gym to get that done since it is 104 today! Jo - hope you are ready to go girl.......I hope my legs will hold me up - they're still sore!!

So all of that brings me to yesterday - I did great all day with my food UNTIL - yes, until - I made oatmeal raisin cookies.........picture Trixie/Barbie basically covered in flour and working furiously on a labor of love for her Ken...........Oatmeal raisin cookies - they are Ken's favorite and I wanted to suprise him with something special. I did really well while mixing the dough - not even a nibble but then I had to smell them baking..........it was ON!! Somehow I managed to escape only eating one whole cookie but the crispy edges that I peeled off several others probably amounted to another couple. Ken probably thinks that I am the crappiest cookie baker in the world - I love the crisp edges so all of his cookies look like they have been peeled or something!

I need to catch up with everyone and check out the Barbie blog - Swizzle you did awesome on it!! I still have a few more names to add too but I'm a tech retard so I'll have to leave that to all of you experts out there! Gonna catch up on everyone's weekend - TTYL!!

9 comments:

Swizzlepop said...

OMG you had me LMAO! Are you okay from your fall? I don't do step for that exact reason. I can dance like no tomorrow but have absolutely no coordination for a step class. They scare me!

Glad you enjoyed it and that you are going back for more you sicko! ;)

Hope you have a less hectic week this week!

Unknown said...

You know I tried to tell K that this white girl can't dance......no coordination - seriously, I broke my ankle three times - once by stepping off a curb and once by falling in a hole.......shit come on! Her response was "but you used to be overweight"......like when you lose weight you gain coordination?

Candace MacPherson said...

Hey, congrats on going back to a job you love. Moving with a kid - crazzzzy. I keep saying, 'let's do it this way for resale', but the fact is, I don't think I could sell with the mess my family makes. Kids will have to be gone and hubby will need to evacuate, LOL.
Where the heck is the Barbie blog?

Anonymous said...

Barbie Blog is located at: http://thebarbiebrigade.blogspot.com/

Amanda said...

OMG, I was laughing so hard. Seriously, though are you okay?? I'm scared of a step class for the same reason. I can't even walk straight!

Enjoy tonight in the tub! The girls will float and look like they belong somewhere! :)

Jo said...

Hooray for you. I never gradumatated to the elevated steps or else I'm sure you wouldn't be the only one on the floor. Ouch! I'm glad you made it through in one piece, though. And I totally relate to the cookie edges, that's the best part :)

P.S. I did it! It was a cool 91 degrees, but it has begun!

WeightBGone said...

LMAO You crack me up girl! I am doing step also but to a DVD at home. Nobody is gonna watch me flopping my ass around. LOL

I fell the first time I did it too missed the step and down on my big butt I went. My DH made the step for me out of wood and I told him he needed to make it MUCH bigger so I wouldnt hurt my wee self. LOL

Great job Steph for working out so hard!!!

MMalloy said...

I hope C25K went better then the step class!! The first time I went to a step class I did everything backwards. I was so worried about not tripping or falling that I forgot I was watching a reflection and when the class went right, I went left...I am glad you enjoyed it enough to want to go back!

Colette said...

Way to go girl!! I am so proud of you for going and doing that class. I know it was hard but it will get easier!

I seriously have NO coordination either!!