This picture makes me cry!

This picture makes me cry!
Thought it was time to change my picture

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Just worn out....

Do you ever have days where you are just tired. I absolutely love my life but I'm tired. I'm overworked in almost every facet of my life. I can't say underpaid because nothing is worth more than waking up in the morning and seeing my baby boy's smiling face. I know that i need to find a balance. I would like to think that I had balance before baby but I know that I didn't. Pre-baby it was all about me all the time. I juggled the hubby and the big kid but they could fend for themselves and truth be told, they enjoyed hanging out together. Mom's typically are a drag on farting contests and food fights. SO I spent a lot of time working on me. Now I don't have that time. I can't stop by the gym on the way home or spend 3 hours there on a Saturday morning. Heck most of the time I can't even get a shower in before Noon on the weekends!! I really thought that I would have a baby, bounce right back in to my 5 spin classes a week and never miss a beat. Hell I thought I would be back on a bike 2 weeks after having Will. What a joke - I couldn't even put together full sentences 2 weeks after I had him let alone hoist my sore butt up on a bike seat...........OUCH!!

Right now I'm at a place that I guess I just never imagined. I've been here before but my focus wasn't being healthy or thin so it didn't matter. When life got in the way before the only thing I missed was 1/2 price burger night at Sonic or the latest episode of Friends. Now I'm missing me and who I've been. Being healthy is like a drug.......once your knees have quit aching and you have more energy, it's like you crave it. DUH! Imagine that, my body screaming to take a load off??!

I'm working on food for the next couple of weeks and I'm doing good but I know that at some point I've got to fit in the exercise. Not necessarily to be a size 4 again but to be healthy. To live a long life for my kids and to be a good example for them. There isn't a lot attractive about a mom that can't chase her toddler or play ball with her elementary school child. That's just not the mom that I want to be. As much as I hate it I may really have to get up earlier and exercise.......I really am lazy by nature but it seems that early morning is my only free time. We'll see but for now I'm sticking to the diet and will be weighing in tomorrow. I'll report back as to how it goes.


(((HUGS)))

Friday, September 25, 2009

Adobe Huts

So it's Friday night and I'm knee deep into making a cardboard replica of an adobe hut......why you ask?? Are you interested in the Jumano Indian tribe.....hmmmm, no can't say that I am. Do you enjoy crafting Native American replicas........uh that would be a negative. Well are you in 7th grade and failed to complete a huge project that was due today??? Nope not me but absolutely my kid. Ughhh.....the 12 year old had a huge Tx. History project due today and of course he chose Wednesday to start working on it. I may have to show him how the Indians did it and scalp him!! Geez!

In other news, well I don't really have other news. Things are plugging along as usual. The ususal chaos fills the house - barking dog, teething baby, hormonal teenager, in laws and a cranky hubby. Calgon take me away. In my quest to relax I escaped to the closet because that is where we keep the computer. I log on to Facebook to check on everything because there is way less drama on the internet. :) What do you think I find.......a husband and wife hurling insults at each other via their "walls". OMG - really, seriously - what are we in highschool. Why would you choose to air your dirty laundry on the internet.......especially on FB which, uh, happens to have as many users as the United STates has people. Good grief - get a grip folks! I guess it would be pretty entertaining if I wasn't just so done with drama. Kind of like your own "As The World Turns".

Things are going good on the eating front. I'm not nearly as disciplined as I used to be but that will come. I'm doing my best to steer clear of the carbs because that is my weakness. Hi my name is Stephanie and I'm a carb addict - yep that is me. I love me some bread or cookies or muffins or pretzels or pasta.......oh Lord I have to stop before I go into a carb coma! We'll see how nice the scale decides to be on Tuesday......I'm keeping my fingers crossed and hopefully I can keep my lips closed so I don't shove anything into this over zealous piehole of mine!

Gotta run - the first coat of mud on the hut is dried and it's time to slap on another coat. Yay - good times.

(((HUGS)))

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Back on the wagon....AGAIN

When I say back on the wagon I'm talking about diet and blogging. Well I hope I mean blogging. It seems that lately blogging is as distant as my good eating habits. I have been so engulfed in all things baby that I've really forgotten about myself. I'm not upset or bitter about this because actually I rather like be all mommy...all the time. My husband; however, would like to have his wife back on occasion. He has no issue with my weight or eating habits but rather with my lack of "me". I admit that most conversations revolve around baby poop, baby food, baby milestones or some other adorable thing that Will does. My brain has gone to baby and rest of me still looks pregnant. I'm in a bit of a mess but never fear......barbie aka trixie is back. I may be a more toned down trixie but nevertheless I'm BACK! So my plan for now is to start making small changes - there is no possible way that one can revert back to clean eating in one day. So for now I'm cutting out processed carbs - unless you count the half an oatmeal raisin cookie that I just ate. See......this is going to take work but it is really important to me to be a healthy, non-frumpy mom. God I've never worn workout pants and t-shirts so much in my life. BLAH!!

So that's it in nutshell. I'm back......mommy gut and all. Now wish me luck as I start the trek back to barbieville.