This picture makes me cry!

This picture makes me cry!
Thought it was time to change my picture

Thursday, January 10, 2008

Trying out for the Dr. Phil show!!

But not to be a guest - I wanna be the host!! LMAO - I was watching his New Year's Resolution show last night and there was a woman who weighed 375 pounds and wanted to lose weight. I could so identify with her because she was a fast food junkie and a closet eater. That WAS the story of my life - I felt her pain and understood her total despair. I was momentarily transported back to a few years ago and reminded of how far I have come! As if that realization wasn't enough for me, Dr. Phil started telling this woman what she needed to do to make the changes - these were all things that I figured out ON MY OWN! These were things that I did without professional help - I put the pieces together and did it. Sorry if that sounds conceited but anyone that knows me, knows that I am far from conceited about my weight loss. Actually I am one of those people that spends too much time feeling like I've failed (hard not to feel that way when you quit seeing the scale move down but continue to see a flappy pannus - damn body image issues!) when in reality I lost 245 pounds through blood, sweat and tears.........I DID IT - I made myself gut up and do it and guess what, I'm damn proud of myself. I'm proud of the fact that even when people question my wacky food habits that I stick to my guns - I can sit at a restaurant and enjoy conversation with people without eating. I can pass by a fast food restaurant and a vending machine without breaking into a sweat. I can make time for exercise and realize that some days I'm not going to necessarily "like" it. I can limit my contact with people who don't support my healthy lifestyle and in the process I have surrounded myself with people who share my quest for health (that would be you guys!).

Okay so off that soapbox......I will say that a friend watched it and commented on the fact that Dr. Phil was being "mean" to this woman.........I laughed and said mean??? Come on, she is a grown up who weighs 375 pounds and trust me, she knows why she weighs that. She doesn't need someone to be nice to her......she needs someone to be real with her. Maybe that is harsh but I wish that people had been more real with me - more willing to help me deal with why I consumed 10,000 calories a day in Big Mac's. The reality of our culture is - ohhhhhh, she's overweight so she must be lazy and probably doesn't want to change so we shouldn't bother with her. I can't tell you how many times I felt put off - people won't even look you in the face when you weigh that. Hell, in most cases they treat you like a circus animal - do a trick and I'll give you a cookie. It was refreshing to see Dr. Phil empower this person to take ownership of their life and their choices - to give her hope and to help her realize that being overweight is about soooo much more than how/what you eat. You can drink slimfast all day long AND yes you will lose weight but trust me - when the rubber meets the road......slimfast isn't going to make you thin or healthy but most of us really already know that!

Sorry, I'm getting sidetracked AGAIN. I met with GYM again last night. I wasn't going to, I really didn't want to, it was totally my intention to suck out but before I lurked off towards home I had to stop by Kate's Blog, you know the chick with the great recipes and quotes (From Flab to Fit) and read up on how she's doing. Well I scrolled down and saw this quote: It is the nature of man to rise to greatness if greatness is expected of him.
- I knew at that moment that GYM totally expected to see me.......I couldn't let him down.......I couldn't let myself down, after all I am destined to be a GREAT, HOT barbie! So I went - GYM was a happy fellow - especially after I spent an hour "shaking my money maker" for him......and let me tell ya, judging from the way my "money maker" hurts today, I should be a female Bill Gates - who knew that 2 weeks with no circuit training could result in this kind of soreness! Damn those 10 pound weights that are making me GREAT!

Okay gotta get back to work - thanks to all of you for being supportive and not feeding this circus monkey!


melissious said...

Me reading your blog (this is OUT LOUD at my desk at work, mind you): Holy crap... HOLY CRAP!! THIRTY four to a FOUR?!!
I've read you a few times, but I think I just forgot. I've never been a 4. Never. I think I went from kids' sizes to a size twelve. I remember those kid size 6 & 6x for some reason... and the next thing I remember is the 12's. Man, I wish I was in the 12's now!! I'm officially jealous of you (and, yes, I know jealousy isn't going to help me any!) :)

Tina said...

It's no joke, you inspire girlie. I'm sitting here, wondering how I'm gonna get off 44 pounds for my first goal and how IMPOSSIBLE it seems especially when the scale has only budged 1.2 lbs total (with gains and losses) for ten weeks. Trying to hang in though... something's gotta give right? Let me know when you have your own talk show. I'll definitely Tivo you.

ps. I accept your apology for almost running me down last night. Here's mine for telling you "you're number one!" :)))

Kathy said...

Stay up on that soapbox because America needs to listen. There are a lot of us out here who have figured out that Slimfast and January 1 resolutions are not a is a daily desire to put one foot in front of the other and keep on trying that gets you to a healthy lifestyle that will sustain the weight loss. There is no sugar coating that fact. Good for you! And I love Kate too...she's great!

Diet Coke and Zingers said...

Steph- You continue to be an inspiration to me... I love reading your blog- hearing about your adventures with Gym and the chocolate sprinkles... You are awesome!

Kathy said...

Steal all the recipes you want, Steph! I'm so happy to know you!

Kate said...

Awww thanks for the shout out....LUV Ya!

As Kathy said, you do need to stay on your soapbox, because so many people just don't understand what the proper way to "be healthy" is, they think being healthy is being a size 0 and eating nothing but carrots, but it is so far from the truth. I wish people took the time to educate people more on the proper way to lose weight....and to instill proper nutrition in people.

Frances said...

I got a name for your show!
"GET REAL" with Stephanie

I hear your voice sometimes when I'm reaching for that cookie.. "Get real girl... don't you know your stronger that that?"

Thanks for being such an inspiration.

WeightBGone said...


YOU are my inspiration! You have every right to be proud of yourself and how far you've come. Hell, girlfriend I am so proud of you myself.

You made me laugh when I need to smile, you help me stay on track by also having this love/hate relationship with "Gym" I always remind myself that I can't let Steph be the only one doing Gym. LOL

You are a sweetheart and thanks for always being here for me. Hope your weekend is wonderful. :)

Scale Junkie said...

See this is what I needed to hear today as I sit here weighing in at 366 doesn't just take a few days of eating right and takes A LOT of hard work and even when you have lost 245 pounds, you have to STILL keep working hard. I'm back on track and I needed these words today to keep my ass in gear on the motivation highway! :::big hugs to you::: and thank you!!

Candace said...

Hey Steph, Way to go on catching up with GYM. When do you hear back on the heart issue, or have they put that off since the swelling went down?

Anonymous said...

Hey Steph! Way to hand in there and I know "GYM" was so excited to see you! Keep up the good work!

Ready to Shrink said...

I can't agree more than I do about the being real. I have finally been honest and real with myself and have started my "journey" (ugh I hate that word it sounds so touchy feely) to being healthy.

I've lost 61 pounds since 10/23 and I am no where near goal but I will get there. Your blog is awesome. You have done what I hope to be able to do. I will definitely be back.