Just BLOATING Through Life!21 06 2007
First off this is day 3 of blogging - yeah me! I’m pretty proud of that because it really is a great release for me and proves that I CAN stick to it! In fact I have thought of a zillion things to write about but will keep them in reserve and just release a little each day - that way I don’t get bored and stop writing. By the way - one of my goals for life is to write a book………I know it may sound corny but it is something that I WILL do at some point - even if no one reads it - I’m doing it primarily for myself anyway!
Okay so on to the bloat issue - every morning I wake up with this awful bloated belly. Now in all honestly I can attribute a large part of this to the large meal that I eat right before bed. Yes, I know - bad habit but I get so busy in the evenings that by the time I can sit down and eat it is almost bed time. I don’t eat bad food, well unless you count the 2 chocolate chip cookies that I sneaked last night - hehe! Really I eat fresh veggies and some sort of protein (tofu/egg whites). The problem is that I eat past satisfied and I know that this causes some of my belly bulge in the a.m. I also started a new job about 3 months ago and in the process have managed to gain about 10 pounds!!!
I know that 10 pounds doesn’t sound like a big deal to some people but it does horrible things to my mental state and let’s face it - regardless of how good you look and how slim you are, if you are going to jump off the parking garage to your untimely death then 10 pounds is a big deal! I guess the fact that you would consider jumping over 10 pounds is a big deal too - lol!
So my goals for today are:
1. Eat light for dinner and at least 2 hours before bed - make it a priority!
2. Take a walk at some point during the day - even if it is a short one - I really have to start making more time for this kind of thing! Geez, if I only liked it???
3. Come back and write my promised review of saggy skin - I really feel the need to work through this issue so if everyone could just humor me for a bit I would appreciate it.
4. No binging on vegetables - good God, holy moly, what is my issue. Seriously - why is it that I feel the need to sit down and eat a bag of carrots through to the end……..swear to you my fingers are going to turn orange. Or what about the half a head of cauliflower that I consume………I mean, really, at some point cauliflower does lose it’s appeal but my brain doesn’t seem to mind that. I realize that eating green beans rather than jelly beans is a plus but like I said - binging on beans is as bad as binging on anything else because it still proves my distorted relationship to food!
Oh I guess since I am setting goals I should confess too - I made mac N cheese for the kiddo’s lunch today - I did soooooooooo good while making it but at 5:00 a.m. my insomnia kicked in and I decided that cold macaroni, straight out of the fridge was exactly what would rescue me from the evil clutches of insomnia……….so I went to the fridge, opened up the container and dug my fingers into the squishy goodness that is cold, generic, boxed mac and cheese - ick!! I dug around and shoveled a few bites in before realizing that I wouldn’t feed a friend cold mac and cheese nor would I eat this way in front of ANYONE so I had to stop - this was not healthy - I said STOP - did you hear me???? For the love of all that is holy, step away from the tub o’ cheese………….finally my brain caught up and I replaced the lid and slid the bowl back in the fridge. I washed my hands, put my girl panties back on, took my self inflicted scolding, slipped back into bed and then gave myself a pat on the back for not consuming more than a few rubbery noodles. Today is a new day and I’ll try to remember that I’m human and for some reason the “you are not a human garbage can” button is not operating in my brain. My “you’re full” valve has been broken for a bit so I have to remember to pay attention - if my bloated belly can’t tell me to stop then my blemished brain will have to pick up the slack for a bit - so that’s the story.
Gotta run off to meetings but never fear - Sister Saggy Pants will be back to share her saga of stretch marks and sags!!!